Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Open Arms

Monday was my dads funeral and it was a hard day that I am glad is over. I have a EMPTY feeling now that I do not know if it will ever go away. I feel completly different then when my mom died 10 months ago. I HATE that they both are gone and my kids do not have the JOY of having them as Grandparents but I am glad they are together again.

When my sister walked into the room after my dad passed away Journey song "OPEN ARMS" was playing. We played it at the service and it is a beautiful song with a lot of meaning now. When I got there I stopped and got us both a beer and we sat with my dad and toasted them on the beach together again. We placed his little cooler and radio in with him as he ALWAYS carried it to the beach with their chairs..my mom carried snacks to feed the seagulls which ALWAYS pooped on my dad:)
Since my dad was in the service he had Taps played. My sister spoke at the service as she did at my moms and I am so PROUD of her..I could never have gotten up and say ALL she did but she did and it was BEAUTIFUL!!!

I had a lot of my friends from here drive the hour and a half to come to the service which meant SO MUCH TO ME!!! The only thing that has gotten me through this last year is MY friends and I so appreciate ALL that they have done for us!!!

Friday night I went to a outdoor concert with a group of Friends....Denise bought me the ticket a while ago and after my dad died on Thursday I was not going to go but I decided that evening that I needed to...Karen said something that night that I will NEVER forget and I do not think she realizes the IMPACT that it had on me...Wednesday night when I was coming home from Cinti there was the most BEAUTIFUL big Orange sunset which when I saw it it was there for a few seconds then dropped behond trees. I thought "that looks just like a Florida Sunset"! As soon as I said that I thought my dad is going to pass tonight..well it was the next morning. Friday night when we were at the concert there was the BIGGEST Orange Moon. Karen pointed it out and said "Your mom gave you the Sun and your dad just gave you the Moon". That sentence will be with me FOREVER!! I have wanted a tatoo for EVER on my ankle (YES I am a BIG chicken) and that is what I would want..a sun, moon and a palm tree. Now I just need to get my nerve up and GO!!!

We are leaving on vacation the beginning of August (Gulf Shores) and I have to say I am sooo looking forward to getting away. We booked this a long time ago and it was suppose to be my family, my sister and her youngest and my dad..My sister and Katlin are still going with us and we WILL be having a lot of drinks in honor of my parents.

6 comments:

Pug Mama said...

I am reading this with tears.
So beautiful.
Your father would be so proud.

Suzanne said...

I SO agree your parents would both be PROUD of you! I will go with you to get your tatoo and hold your HAND!! In fact, I will give you a couple mojitos too!

Denise said...

Your sister did a wonderful job speaking at the funeral. When you and Sandy go on vacation you can remember all of the good times and silly times you shared all these years going on vacation with your Mom and Dad. Those memories are the things that make it bearable. Toast them, laugh, and remember that they will always be in your hearts. Your parents had a wonderful, loving life together and with you and Sandy. A love for each other that is the envy of all. And WOW, I remember that moon that night. It was so huge and ORANGE. That was the sign that they were finally together again on the beach with the beer and the sea gulls. I love you...

Daniella said...

Coming over from pug mamma to say I'm sorry for the loss of your dad. Your parents sounds amazing. My dad died 8 years ago (my son as 14 months old) and I was so sad that he would not have a grandpa - I still am. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him. It's gets easier but the memories will keep you storng.

Alyson and Ford said...

What beautiful memories, you must have had a very special and loving family.
Saying a toast to your parents is like a prayer that they will hear.
Enjoy your vacation with your parents' loving thoughts surrounding you.

Alyson LID 01/27/06

Special K said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad... and your mom, too. That's a lot to deal with in a short amount of time.

I think the tattoo idea sounds perfect. And what an amazing way to honor them and have a special part of them with you always.